Jimmy-One-Gear, a Doctor Visit, and a Crossword

Day: 20 (Simpson, IL to Carbondale, IL)

Average Speed: Who cares?

Miles Cycled Today: 39.5

Miles Cycled Total: 1188

Mood: Whatever

My "Grid Art" is Just as Bad as My "Map Art"

Hey, Joop! See This Bullet Riddled Sign? 
I'll Translate It for You in Dutch: Heuvelachtig Terrein!

Hills in "The Mini Ozarks" (Photos Never Do Justice to Hills)

Ever see a cyclist pedaling up a big hill? And his little legs are going at lightening speed, but the bike is only moving inches at a time? It's kind of funny looking, isn't it? 

It's even funnier if that guy is on flat land. 

Yup! That was me today! If I had a Mafia nickname it would be Jimmy-One-Gear. 

You see, my shifter was broken at the start of the day today, and rather than having to get off my bike every time there was a hill (and there were plenty! Surprise!) and manually move the chain to an appropriate cog, I just decided to keep the chain on "hill mode."

It was absurd.


 All 39.5 miles of it. 

But I made it! And without a SAG!

There are three cycle shops in Carbondale (mind you, there hasn't been one in sight since Radford, Virginia), and they're all conveniently right next to one another. Literally. Side by side by side. I don't quite understand that as a small business strategy, but as long as someone's there to fix my bike, who cares?


The doctor was in at Carbondale Cycle, and although he was a bit busy, he found time to fix it up to mint condition. 

It was going to take a while-- but I still needed lunch and a new phone. No rush.

While waiting in the (very) crowded Verizon Store I checked out the upcoming terrain for when I hit Missouri, which should be tomorrow. Check it out and compare it with today.

Today's (Short) Route

The Ozarks

Here is what Jimmy-One-Gear did today.













And here is what looms ahead.

It might as well be the printout of my pulse.

Steep ups. Steep downs. All the way through the whole damn state. 

It seems I forgot about a little mountain range called the Ozarks when I said I was going to sail through Missouri.

Whoops.

Verizon Store Waiting

I can't complain about the wait in the Verizon Store- it wasn't all that bad and Brittani saw to me for well over an hour when my number was called. She found every loophole in the insurance to ensure I walked out of the store with a phone today rather than having to get it through the mail-- this is above and beyond-- something they never do.

She didn't have that I-Just-Pretend-I-Care-Because-I-Have-To corporate employee look- she genuinely cared. After a while, it didn't even bother me that her first name ended with an i. 

She also insisted I buy a better case, and not because she was on commission. Sold.

So that's pretty much my day. Silly cycling for four hours in the morning plus five hours of running around town equals a half-wasted day. I was going to do another ten miles to Murphysboro, but what's the point? There's nothing there.

With all the downtime today, I did what any normal human being would do. I wrote a crossword puzzle. It's inspired by one of the two shirts that I wear on a daily basis. 

It shouldn't be hard- I made it Monday level easy (perhaps a bit easier, perhaps a bit harder... i dunno), but give it a whirl and see if you can figure out the theme.

Feel free to tell me how long it took you to solve if you give it a go... especially competitive solvers  (ahem... Addie... Austin... Amy). 

There may be typos and inaccuracies- feel free to point those out too. 

Also, many clues are self-referential (including one theme answer)... so it might be a bit easier if you've been reading this blog up to this point.

CLICK HERE if you're a normal person and want to print it out. It's a PDF.

CLICK HERE to download the .PUZ file if you have solving software and use a computer for crosswords. If you don't know what that is... then stick with the PDF for now. 

and CLICK HERE  for the PDF solution if you get stuck.



And please... no swearing if you can't figure an answer out. I've had too many cross words for today. 

Heh heh. 

Ugh.

P.S.

"But officer... I don't have a kickstand!"

Honestly didn't see sign until I got back.